6 Reasons Why You Should Love Your Negative Thoughts
Having suffered depression in my early adulthood I know how it feels to be bombarded with negative thoughts and feelings. As I got even more caught up in this web of despair I noticed that my negative thoughts were often related to situations that were going to happen in the future. I would make up worse case scenarios around things I had planned. I would get anxiety about stuff that hadn’t even manifested. I would imagine the worst possible outcome, but of course it never happened in the end. It was simply that my mind was working in an un-resourceful way.
My life began to improve in amazing ways when I stopped blaming myself and other people for my negative thoughts. Along my journey of inner healing, I discovered that I had complete control over my thoughts and needed to learn to embrace them, nurture them and make friends with my mind.
Here I share how you can change the way you think and stimulate more positive thoughts and feelings as a result:
1. Your Subconscious Mind has a Positive Intention
The subconscious mind is a powerful part of us and the more we can understand how it works, the easier it becomes to control our thoughts and behaviours. Although it may sound crazy, the subconscious mind always has a positive intention. Its job is to protect us from pain, so as a result it will always try to move you away from pain and into pleasure. If you are experiencing negative thoughts, take a pen and paper and write out the areas of your life where you would like to be happier. If you do not know, then start with what is not going well for you right now and what you would like instead.
2. Your Emotions Want to Be Released
When you feel low, there will be feelings and emotions that you are suppressing in some way. Our emotions are meant to move through us (e-motion) and when they get stuck, they build up like an overflowing bucket of water. People who are more uplifting and positive have often felt and dealt with their emotions – either by talking about what is bothering them to a friend or relative, writing a journal, or seeking out a professional for support. Is there a situation or someone you need to let go of? Are you holding grudges or carrying burdens? If you are unsure grab some paper and write out all the people or things that are bugging you right now and work it back to the last time you can remember feeling happy. It’s worth having a good dig down to really understand and acknowledge your feelings. Then you can work on changing how you feel.
3. Your Mind Wants to Protect You
We are bombarded on a daily basis by fear and fear is a contribution to thinking negatively. Our mind wants to protect us so when we are subjected to negative reports on the telly, we naturally begin to process the threat of what might happen to us too. The fear could be the newspapers reporting on the next life threatening epidemic or the media reporting on stories where people have been harmed in some way. When we are in a negative pattern of thinking, these stories can be more harmful to us and we automatically think “this could happen to me”. Spending time away from newspapers and the television will have a positive impact on your mindset. If you could spend a couple of weeks reading more positive and uplifting stories, you will start to feel more positive and uplifted as a result.
4. You Can Think Positively of Others
In my favourite book “Living With Joy”, Sanaya Roman describes how we are all energy and when we think negative thoughts we are expending a denser energy vibration out into our environment. As a result we attract people and situations into our life that reflect a similar vibration. You can change this vibration by thinking more uplifting thoughts, using more uplifting words and also having more positive thoughts about other people. Start by noticing your language and how you talk to yourself. If you are constantly talking in a negative way in your head, look to re-frame your sentences. Start by giving yourself a compliment each day. Acknowledge when someone does something nice for you or gives you a compliment. If you tend to speak negatively about others or visualise someone in a negative way, try having more uplifting thoughts about them instead. Focus on their strengths and the things they do well. This will make you feel good too!
5. Your Subconscious Mind Likes To Experience New Things
Feeling a sense of achievement is very important to your happiness and well-being because the subconscious mind likes to experience new things and then measure progress. One thing that life guarantees is change and transitional cycles. Your life will always be offering you opportunities to learn and grow but it is down to you to make the change happen. The mind likes to be stretched and challenged so it will always be looking for situations and experiences it can grow from. What would you love to do which you haven’t had the courage to begin? What do you get great joy from and would do even if you weren’t being paid? What gives you a feeling of fulfilment and joy?
6. You Are in Control of How Other People Make You Feel
No one else should take responsibility for how you feel and this can seem difficult to comprehend at first. When you blame another person for making you feel a certain way, you are shifting responsibility for your feelings on to them. If you do this then you have no control or power over your own feelings. In addition you will be waiting a long time for happiness too. We can’t control what other people say or do to us, but we can control how we respond to them. This works both ways and when you affirm and implement this way of thinking into your life, a wonderful feeling of empowerment will come over you. As a result your self-esteem will improve and you’ll be the captain of your life!
By doing all of the above exercises, you will be re-framing your thinking and when you can train your mind to think in more positive ways, your mind will begin to think more loving thoughts.