Flourish in Your Forties: What You Should Know About Perimenopause
As a woman in my forties, the topic of perimenopause feels especially meaningful. Even more, I feel a deep, driven desire to raise awareness on this topic, as it can significantly and unknowingly impact our mental health and physical well-being. A few years ago, at 43, I hit a wall of exhaustion and burnout. I wasn’t managing my time well, saying yes to every work opportunity that came my way. Adding to that, I struggled with ongoing aches, pains, forgetfulness, and a growing belly; I felt like I just wanted to disappear into oblivion. I’ll admit, I was in denial about perimenopause. Aware of the biological changes that were ahead of me, I dismissed the possibility because I was still having periods and assumed it didn’t apply. Instead of truly addressing what was going on, I found myself seeking comfort in wine and replacing my usual exercise routine with long stretches on the sofa. I felt a deep need to rest, so I scaled back my one-to-one work and focused more on writing hoping I just needed a big rest But in quiet moments of reflection, I came to realise that I was resisting the idea of stepping into what felt like an “older” phase of life. It became clear to me that this is something many women experience too—a reluctance to fully embrace the changes that come with it. I began researching by asking questions to friends and seeking information on the internet, and as a result, I began to realise I was in perimenopause. Through trial and error, I regained balance and a sense of relief, discovering ways to feel better again.
Due to my experience, I began raising the topic of perimenopause with clients—particularly women leaders in their 40s dealing with stress and exhaustion. To my surprise, many hadn’t considered the possibility that their symptoms, like fatigue, forgetfulness, or low mood, might be linked to hormonal changes. There was often some initial resistance, much like I had experienced, but after doing some research many fed back that they felt a deep sense of relief and thanked me for bringing it up. They weren’t losing their minds; they weren’t alone, and they had options to explore.
Understanding Perimenopause
Perimenopause and menopause bring profound hormonal changes that can significantly affect our emotional and physical well-being. Perimenopause typically begins in our 40s, though for some women it can start as early as 35. During this time, levels of oestrogen and progesterone, two key hormones, begin to fluctuate and gradually decline.
These hormones are integral to much more than reproductive health; they deeply influence brain function, organ regulation, and even muscle health. When oestrogen levels drop, it can trigger a host of symptoms: body aches, brain fog, hot flushes, disrupted sleep and mood swings. It’s not just about irregular periods.
Hormonal changes during this phase can also make it harder to manage stress. The body’s ability to handle physical and emotional strain is diminished, while heightened cortisol levels may exacerbate feelings of overwhelm, thyroid imbalances, and even burnout. This period can feel even more intense when balanced alongside the demands of work, family, and personal responsibilities. Many women find themselves re-evaluating their careers, relationships, and lifestyles, seeking more balance and purpose as they navigate these changes.
Is It Perimenopause?
If you’re between 35 and 50 and haven’t considered perimenopause, take a moment to reflect on these common symptoms:
- Emotional: Anxiety, depression, mood swings, tearfulness
- Cognitive: Brain fog, forgetfulness, trouble concentrating, ADHD like Symptoms
- Physical: Hot flushes, night sweats, sleep disturbances, joint and muscle pain, fatigue, weight gain (especially around the belly), dry skin and hair, decreased libido
- Menstrual Changes: Irregular periods, breast tenderness
- Others: Sensitivity to light, cold hands and feet, urinary issues
While the list may feel overwhelming, recognising the signs can help you take the first step toward feeling better.
The Heroes Journey
During this transition, you might find yourself quietly asking questions like, “Who am I now?” or “What needs to change?” Perhaps there’s a sense of grief as you gently let go of the person you once were, leaving behind an old version of yourself. The flood of questions that arise can stir up confusion and uncertainty, mixing feelings of loss with a newfound sense of freedom. But on the brighter side, this can be a time of shedding roles and identities that no longer serve you, creating space for a new chapter that feels more aligned with who you are now. It’s a deeply personal journey, unique for each of us. If you’re feeling this stir of reevaluation, it’s an invitation to pause, listen, and reconnect with your inner voice. This is an opportunity to rediscover passions that may have been tucked away under years of caring for others or fulfilling career demands, and to reclaim the space to dream! While this process can be unsettling, it’s also a chance to step into a more authentic, empowered version of yourself, one that honours the life you’ve already lived while opening the door to the limitless possibilities that lie ahead. It can be a time of great transformation!
Solutions to Consider
Perimenopause is a significant time of change which can feel particularly intense, as many women are also balancing work, family, and personal responsibilities. The combination of fluctuating hormones and heightened stress can create a rollercoaster of emotional overwhelm and fatigue which can very much affect how we feel. This time in our life can also lead many of us to re-evaluate our career, leave a job, relationship or deciding on more balanced lifestyle. As a result it can stir a profound review of what we’re no longer willing to tolerate, a review of our deepest desires, potentially opening the door to an entirely new chapter.
The good news is, there are solutions and what’s right for you is deeply personal. Some women choose natural, holistic approaches, while others explore medical options like body-identical hormone replacement therapy (HRT). For me, a combination of HRT and homeopathy made a big difference. But every journey is unique.
No matter what you choose, supporting your emotional, mental, and physical health is key. Lifestyle changes like eating well, exercising, and managing stress can make a world of difference. What we eat, in particular, plays a powerful role in hormone production. A balanced diet with whole, unprocessed foods, especially those rich in healthy fats and plant-based phytoestrogens, can help your body find stability.
Considering HRT
If you’re hesitant about HRT, it’s worth noting that the options available today are far safer and more effective than they were in the past. Much of the fear surrounding HRT stems from outdated research on synthetic versions, but body-identical HRT, when guided by a professional, can be incredibly beneficial. Beyond managing symptoms, it may even support long-term brain and bone health.
Talking to others about their experiences with HRT can also be helpful. I found it reassuring to hear different perspectives as I made my own decision. If you’re post-menopause but still experiencing symptoms, know that there’s no upper age limit for starting HRT in many cases. It’s never too late to explore your options with a healthcare professional.
Reflections
Perimenopause and menopause mark a powerful transition, a new chapter that can feel daunting but also offers an opportunity for self-discovery and renewal. With the right support and tools, it’s possible to navigate this time with grace and come out stronger on the other side. If any of this resonates with you, take it as an invitation to pause, reflect, and care for yourself as you unravel the mysteries of your stirrings. You may find the below information useful if you need a little extra support <3
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